The North Face is becoming an army. I was sitting in class the other day, I counted 7 out of the 20 kids in my class wearing a North Face jacket, trendy as fuck. After school, I see some 20 something guy walking with his 5 or 6 year old kids. Both his kids and him were wearing North Face jackets. What the fuck? What’s next? North Face sponsoring the Olympics? I cant stand these people, its all want want want. Why do people need to feed off of these material things? The North Face is actually a legit weather-wear clothing brand. I respect it in that, but I dont respect the people that are flamboyant when it comes to their North Face shit.

Uggs, holy shit. Every girl in the world thinks she can pull off the Uggs/Jeans combo. Seriously? If you weigh more than 130 pounds, you shouldnt wear these. Honestly, this can look super attractive on the right girl. But when a gross fucking broad is wearing this shit, its sucks. I dont care how narrow minded I sound.

Ed Hardy, the man himself, great artist, his clothing line, fucking terrible. Who the fuck puts rhinestones on a baseball cap and sells it for hundreds? These shirts have got to be the ugliest things I have ever seen.  Hey, lets pay 200 dollars for a t shirt that looks like someone ate skittles and puked it all over it and then proceeded to cover it in rhinestones. I make that much in two weeks. Fuck people.

I am surrounded by this shit. My school is one big trend war, who can wear the most expensive shit. I hate this fucking town.

Restless nights in a one night cheap hotel
Hometown restaraunts next to gambling hell

Time for a hundred indecisions
And for a hundred visions and revisions

I have measured out my life with sticks and stones
But Im giving it away, with all my heart and all my bones

This is what I have thus far.

Midnight in America-150 pressed on clear with limited edition cover. Sold only at This is Hardcore Fest 2007

Midnight in America-325 pressed on gray with Lifeline Records stamped on dust sleeve.

Midnight in America-325 pressed on transparent red.

Midnight in America-1000 pressed on black and white swirl.

Midnight in America-1000 pressed on transparent blue. 200 of which were used for the final tour version.

My Love, My Way-200 pressed on white and yellow swirl

My love, My Way-332 Pressed on white.

My Love, My Way-1200 pressed and gold and black swirl.

Witness-116 out of 150 pressed on black with silver labels. Posi-Numbers Press. Silk-screened cover. Hand Numbered

Witness-182 out of 150 pressed on black with silver labels. Posi-Numbers Press. Silk-screened cover. Hand Numbered

Witness-250 pressed on clear with black splatter. Came with a picture sleeve.

Witness-500 pressed on purple.

Witness-1000 pressed on blue marble

These are all the 12″ I have. I still have Witness on dark transparent blue out of 100 that is in the mail.

I will update this as I consume more records.

I still need the following:

Midnight in America-Final Tour Press on Clear Blue /200 comes with the S/T 7″ on blue
Midnight in America-Black /500
Midnight in America-Black/Grey /350
Midnight in America-Black/Yellow /150

My Love, My Way-Brown /665
My Love, My Way-Gold /109

Witness-Grey w/ Black Splatter /250
Witness-Record Release Show Press /62
Witness-Blood Red /150
Witness-Blue on Black /250
Witness-Green Swirl /500

12/23, over halfway there.

Everything seems to be getting back to normal now. The visitation is tomorrow, and the funeral is Wednesday. She has been cremated. It is definitely hitting my grandpa the hardest. All I can remember from last Thursday is my grandpa holding my grandma’s hand, crying, thanking her for being his wife for 50 years. It was the worst thing to see such a big guy cry. He may look hard, but he has the softest heart. I love my grandpa.

As you probably know, I am straightedge. People always seem to ask me why I am. One reason, my grandma. I haven’t told many people about this, but I feel like I should get my feelings out. About 2, 2 and a half years ago, I was staying at my grandparent’s house. My grandma and I went over to my Aunt’s house across the street for a small fire/cookout on her driveway. It was a lot of fun, and we had a good time. We decided to call it a night, so we got up, thanked them, and walked back over to my grandparent’s house. When we got there, all the lights were off. We figured that my grandpa just went to sleep. We walked up to the front door, but it was locked. We tried the back door, but it was locked. We even tried the garage door, but the power was off. All of the sudden my grandpa opens the window. We asked him what he was doing, he was obviously drunk. He started talking about how my grandma didn’t care about him and how she didn’t care about him when she had a heart attack. He called her a bitch and told her to sleep on the street in a box because he didn’t feel she deserved to come inside. My aunt overheard the yelling, so she ran over and saw what was happening. She convinced my grandpa to let us in. My grandma went straight to the kitchen, I followed. I couldn’t even look at my grandpa. My grandma is just staring at the ground when I walk in the kitchen. All of the sudden she walks over to me, hugs me, and starts crying. I have never heard my grandma cry until that night. These were her exact words that she said to me. “Austin, I don’t ever want you to become the type of person your grandfather is. I don’t want you to become an alcoholic. Please, just promise me you won’t.” I gave her my word, that I would never become what he was. That night, my grandpa finally realized what pain he has caused my grandma and our family. He used to have a drinking problem a couple years ago. He has finally overcome it, he still does drink one or two every day, but he has come a long way.

I’ll never forget what my grandma told me, and what my grandpa was like. To this day, I haven’t broken her promise, and I never will.

My grandma had the biggest impact on my life, she was everything to me. I love her unconditionally, and I always will. She always believed in me, she said I could do anything and be anyone I wanted to be.

Although she’s gone, I know that she is always with me in whatever I do. She will always be here for me. I love you Nan.